This morning, after another sleepless night, I decided to delete this guy I've known since I was nine. Not just from Facebook, but from Yahoo! Messenger, MSN, Skype. I even deleted his photos. Any remnants of him, basically.
For the last couple of months, I've been missing him when I really shouldn't. My mind is completely consumed by thoughts of him and it's driving me crazy. I left him so long ago, so I have no right to want him back. That's just the way it is. I've come to terms that I can't be involved with him like I used to, but I'm deluded if I think that I could possibly be in his life. I tried.
Didn't work out as well as I'd like it to. All I received was a slap in the face. A punch in the stomach. I wouldn't say I blame him, but I always thought better of him. I somehow hoped that he wouldn't be so hateful. So hurtful. After all these years, I guess I can't expect him to be the same silly 10 year-old boy who was absolutely head over heels for me.
The trouble with deleting someone on Facebook is that you still think about him afterwards. You still wonder. It's not like there's a delete button in life.
I'll always love the old you. The you I once knew.
"haa yeah.
dulu i was like everyday pk tntg u.
and masa form 1 yeah you tau la u minat sapa
n then form 2 i gave up you"
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